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Post by mh on Jun 29, 2014 21:25:28 GMT -6
the monkeyhouse 1970's mall murder mystery weekend with special guest star mel, from mel's waterbed shed
 
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Post by mh on Jun 29, 2014 21:44:17 GMT -6
"no! hell no! no more murder mystery weekends!" exclaims babu baboon.
"no more, 'oh captain baboon! isn't the captain charming! ...' I hate that crap!"
"but this one is set in the early 70's!" explains doc quantum. "and they've rebuilt the entire 'mall of justice' as it was back then! it's a perfect replica! but in east justice instead of here."
"omg, "exclaims baboon, "they'll run this mall right outa bidness!"
"no!" exclaims doc, "it's for east justice only. $700 handbags, that kind of crap. it's targeting the hosh panache! and they're desperate for us to launch the thing."
"how desperate," asks babu.
doc quantum shows babu a check.
"sweet fancy benjamin franklin!" exclaims babu.
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Post by Babu Baboon on Jul 9, 2014 18:14:01 GMT -6
Later, the MA members are at the new East Justice mall dressed in 70s clothes. Babu is sporting a leisure suit and an Andy Gibb 70's wig. MH is wearing a jacket, ascot, and has a 70s man-perm.
"I can't believe I let you talk me into this," Babu says.
"I didn't talk you into it. Ben Franklin did," MH says.
"Hey, guys, do these polyester pants make me look fat?" Hairbutt asks.
"No, your ass does," MH says. "Har! I've always wanted to say that, but my wife would..."
MH is suddenly cut off by a scream. "The disco!" a female voice screeches. "There's a body on the dance floor!"
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Post by mh on Jul 9, 2014 22:21:32 GMT -6
they rush onto the dance floor, and find drivaan prone on the floor, with doc quantum trying to revive him. panicked, they quickly lift drivaan and carry him to the disco infirmary.
"driv ... were you attacked?!" asks 'disco' doc quantum, taking off his 'disco stud' jacket and draping it over him.
"no, *cough cough*, "says drivaan reaching into his pants and pulling out a cucumber. "this cucumber i stuck in my pants to attain the correct andy gibb package must have cut of my circulation! I guess the rubber band was too tight."
"gimme that!" yells 'disco' doc quantum, snatching his jacket away in disgust. then throws it back on him and says, "ewww, keep it!"
as drivaan waves the cucumber around explaining his condition, baboon & mh share a glance and shiver in revulsion.
"c'mon, quantum, "says mh, "let's go pimp hard on some shorties!"
"dammit mh, "rasps disco doc quautum lowly in fury, "they're not 'shorties' they're 'disco ladies'! stay in character!"
suddenly the music changes from 'turn the beat around' to 'do the hustle'.
"now if you'll all excuse me," says disco doc quantum, "disco doc quantum likes disco music!" and going back out on the floor, he grabs a guy who looks like freddy mercury and begins doing 'the hustle'.
"wow, 'disco' doc quantum has really gotten into character!" exclaims babu.
 
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Post by Babu Baboon on Jul 23, 2014 17:02:56 GMT -6
Suddenly, Mel from Mel's Water Bed Shed comes walking up. "Groovy scene, hey guys?"
"Uh, yeah," Babu says.
"Dig those happening threads," he says, looking at Babu and MH's outfits.
"Thanks," they both say.
"Boy this really takes me back," Mel says.
"Yeah?" Babu asks.
"Sure thing. The 70s were our hey-day. Any guy getting serious tail wanted a water bed in the back of his van. And you know who hooked them up?"
"You?" MH says.
"This guy!" Mel says, gesturing to himself with his thumbs as if he hadn't heard MH.
"Cool," Babu says.
"And you know something else?" Mel says.
"What?" Babu says, afraid to ask.
"You'd better believe old Mel had a water bed in the back of his van," Mel chuckles.
"Too much information," Babu whispers to MH.
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Post by mh on Jul 24, 2014 21:52:23 GMT -6
"what a magical nite," says mel, "the 70's are back! hey look -- it's our celebrity guest host!"
"suddenly a lithe figure dances through the crowd up to babu, mel, and mh, and it's denny tario from dance fever.
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Post by mh on Jul 24, 2014 21:54:53 GMT -6
deney: dance fever, hello mh & babu ...
deney: dance fever, it's good to see both of you ...
deney: dance fever, they're paying me a lot of bucks ...
deney: dance fever, this non-regulation fake 70's dance floor kind'a sucks ...
"deney!" cries babu. "what're you doing here?"
"they made me an offer i couldn't refuse, "says deney, still dancing, "my beach house in san guadalupe is infested with wood worm! i was doing the lambada, the forbidden dance of love one day, and the floor gave way and the next thing i knew i was 12 feet under, entangled in a nest of moray eels! if I'm gonna save the place, i need a quick influx of cash!"
"uhhh, deney, "says babu, "you've got a fake rubber knife handle attached to your back ..."
"oops, I almost forgot," says deney, and he sprawls to the floor, muttering, "dance fever, i think i just got murdered, dance fever ... nothing rhymes with murder ..."
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Post by Babu Baboon on Jul 30, 2014 8:13:08 GMT -6
"EEEEEE!!! There's a body on the dance floor!" the same woman from earlier screams.
"She's getting kind of annoying," MH says.
"She's an actress," Mel says. "She's supposed to say that when she sees the victim. She thought Drivtaan was Danny Terrio before."
"But Drivtaan and Danny Tierro don't look anything alike," Babu says.
"It was *ahem* the cucumber...." Mell says.
"Dance Fever... oh yeah..." Danny says smugly from the floor.
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Post by mh on Aug 18, 2014 23:29:56 GMT -6
"oh no!" cries a guy in a denim outfit. "this popular entertainer has been murdered! murder most foul!"
"wait ... isn't that ..." begins babu.
"yes!" exclaims doc quantum dancing past, "it's thatdamnbastard -- the monkey alliance's newest member! and he loves the 70's!"
"omg!" screams a girl pointing. "it's the 'disco inferno'! where'd he come from? this is insane."
then who should walk up wearing a 'disco inferno' t shirt other than kenny.
"this is done my happening, and it done freaks me out!" yells kenny.
"wait, "says mh. how come there are fake zombies peering thru the windows at us?"
"there ain't no fake zombies involved in this ..." begins mel. " ... what th' heck?"
"i told them that old 1970's paint was toxic!" cries mrs. faversham, running over & throwing her arms around babu in fright. "what have i and my wealthy east justice friends done?"
"listen," says mh, coming over & patting her hand, trying to calm the old girl, "they'll be okay. it's probably just the tuna salad! if anyone is to blame it's the caterers."
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Post by Babu Baboon on Sept 7, 2014 10:14:32 GMT -6
Suddenly, the windows begin to push in and zombies start to climb through. "Eeeee," one of the East Justice rich ladies exclaims.
"Everybody run!" thatdamnbastard exclaims. "This 1970s murder mystery has changed into a 1970s zombie movie!"
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Post by mh on Sept 9, 2014 21:58:35 GMT -6
"well," says baboon after they've hustled everyone into woolworths and closed the iron gate ...
"according to every old zombie/horde of vampires movie i've ever seen, it's best to barricade ourselves and wait for an unexpected plot twist to save us."
"my beautiful summertime dream of enjoying the heady days of 70's disco is over!" cries doc quantum. "oh & mh, i saw you twerking!"
"yes, i admit it!" exclaims mh, "i was getting my twerk on! somebody in the 70's might'a twerked! maybe."
the guests huddled together, just stare, terrified.
"dammit you guys!" yells babu, "quit arguing and help me shift these huge boxes of 1970's woolworths brand aspirin in front of these side door!" |
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Post by Babu Baboon on Sept 10, 2014 20:37:41 GMT -6
"Okay," I think we've got all the boxes moved," Doc says. "We've got enough food and water to last a while."
"I can't help thinking we're forgetting something," Babu says.
Deney: Dance Fever! Hey guys open the door..
Deney: Dance Fever! There's zombies on the floor!
Deney: Dance fever! Oh God they're eating me!
Deney: Dance Fever! Those are my intestines I can see...
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Post by Babu Baboon on Oct 4, 2014 9:43:21 GMT -6
"'Oh my God! They ate Deney Terrio!" MH exclaims.
"I wonder if eating him will have any sort of affect on the zombies," Doc Quantum says.
Suddenly, the zombies break out into an ornate dance routine.
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Post by mh on Oct 12, 2014 0:12:04 GMT -6
"omg! poor terrio!" says babu.
"it's okay, "says kenny, "once the zombies is gone babu, me an' buddy will done build a 'deney terrio' regenerator, that will done separate his molecules from the zombies."
"you can do that?" asks babu.
"well i reckon," replies Kenny, "we done built that chocolate fountain over there."
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Post by Babu Baboon on Oct 20, 2014 12:07:27 GMT -6
"First thing's first," Babu says. "We need to do something about those zombies."
thatdamnbastard walks up carrying two paint cans. "Here's the paint cans you asked for."
"What's that for?" Kenny asks.
"That's the 1970s paint Mrs Faversham was talking about," Babu says. "I want you to analyze it and find out whatever's turned those people into zombies so we can deactivate it."
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