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Post by Babu Baboon on Nov 23, 2017 10:37:51 GMT -6
Two days before Thanksgiving, the Monkey Alliance are enjoying a brief lull in crime. Everyone is preparing to dig into the big Monkey Alliance pre-Thanksgiving potluck dinner.
"Wait till you try my wife's sweet potato casserole," Babu says. "Yer gonna die of sheer bliss."
Suddenly, the doorbell dings as someone comes in the front. "Dang it," MH says. "Didn't we put the closed sign out?"
A large figure bursts in the room and Taffy lets out a scream. "Omigod! It's a guy with a turkey head!"
"Well, technically, I'm a turkey with a human body but everyone calls me Turkeyhead anyway," Turkeyhead says.
"Welcome to the new headquarters!" Babu and MH say as they both go up to welcome him.
"Good ol' Turkeyhead!" SuperJesse exclaims.
"WHY DOES..." Dakota starts, pointing.
"Turkeyhead was part of a secret government program where they turned ordinary, harmless looking turkeys into highly skilled and dangerous supersoldiers. Turkeyhead here was badly damaged durung the Korean War, so two brave, ingenious doctors in a MAH unit, Hawkeye Pierce and BJ Honeycutt, replaced his body with that of a brain dead human soldier. The super soldier formula has kept him young all these years."
'So what brings you here?" Doc asks.
"Have you guys been watching the news?" Turkeyhead asks.
"no, we've been getting ready for the potluck."
Turkeyhead flips on the TV where a newscaster is reading a story. "The presidential turkey pardon will take place at two o'clock today in the rose garden where the president wii pardon the turkey, Von Gobbels." A picture flashes up of a turkey with an eye patch over one eye and a jagged scar running down the other side of his face.
"Von Gobbels is an agent who went rogue from the super soldier turkey program," Turkeyhead says. "He's guilty of all sorts of war crimes! We can't let the president pardon that turkey!"
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Post by mh on Jan 20, 2018 3:11:04 GMT -6
"well, I guess you just need a sniper," says mh.
"no, you'd never get a shot!" replies turkeyhead.
"i could done cook him with my heat vision, pal." says superjesse.
"no!" cries turkeyhead. "they can't know the monkey alliance was involved."
"dakota, put on a pot of hot coffee!" exclaims babu. "this is gunna take brain power."
"and maybe some skittles," says superjesse.
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Post by Babu Baboon on Jan 25, 2018 19:34:27 GMT -6
"That turkey farm they're keeping him at has got to be huge," Doc Quantum says. "How are we supposed to pick him out of the crowd?"
"He has a friggin' scar and an eye patch!" MH exclaims.
"Even with an eyepatch, we're talking a lot of turkeys to search through," Babu says.
"That's not all," Steve says, turning his laptop around. "I hacked into the farm's security camera. Look."
"Jesus Christ!" MH exclaims. What the hell happened!"
"That one's done got himself a hook where his left wing oughtta be!" Super Jesse says.
"Think about it," Doc says. "If Von Gobbels was chosen, it's because out of all the turkeys, he was the most photogenic."
"That sick SOB probably maimed all the other turkeys to make sure he was chosen!" Turkeyhead exclaims.
"If all the other turkeys have been uglied up like him, then that's going to make picking him out of the crowd all that harder," Babu says. "If there were some other way to sort him out."
"He's the only one with super soldier serum running through his veins," Turkey Head says.
"It's not like there's such a thing as a super soldier serum detector," Doc says.
"Maybe Buddy and I can done invent one," Kenny says.
"What? Are we supposed to run blood tests on hundreds of turkeys?" Doc says. "We'd need something more like a metal detector or radiation detector."
"The Super Soldier serum uses trace amounts of chemical X," Turkeyhead says. "You could make a detector for that.
"Wait.... Chemical X like on the kids' show, Powerpuff Girls?" Babu says. "My daughter used to watch that when she was little.
"It's not a kids' show," Turkeyhead says. "It's real. The government just wants you to think it's fantasy so no one believes in the serum."
So what do we do?" MH says.
"Well, if Chemical X is real, then that means that the current expert on it is Professor Utonium," Doc says.
"It looks like we're going to the city of Townsville," Babu says.
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Post by Babu Baboon on Jan 25, 2018 20:43:17 GMT -6
Thirty minutes later, the Monkey Mobile is flying over the city of Townesville. "Everything is done so colorful like," Super Jesse says.
Shortly, they land in front of Professor Utonium's house. "It's early,so the Powerpuff Girls are still going to be at Pokey Oaks Kindergarten," Doc Quantum says.
They ring the doorbell and the door slowly opens. They all stifle a gasp because the figure greeting them looks very different from the one they expected.
Babu's nose wrinkles involuntarily. The man smelled like a wino. His hobby outside of creating super heroes was apparently day drinking.
Superheroes," Utonium says in a deadpan voice. "If you're looking for the girls, you missed them. THey've already flown to school."
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Post by Babu Baboon on Jan 25, 2018 21:00:03 GMT -6
We're actually here to see you," Babu Baboon says as they follow him into the house. "We need a sample of chemical X."
"Why don't you just get it from him?" Utonium says, pointing to Turkeyhead.
"You know about me?" Turkey Head says.
"I spent my career studying the super soldier serum," Professor Utonium scoffs. "It's what led me to isolating Chemical X."
"If that stuff is so powerful, why do they water it down?" MH says. "I mean, we could have an army of soldiers as tough as the Powerpuff Girls!"
"Why?!!" Utonium cried, holding up a picture of his girls. "Do they look normal to you?
"What soldier in his right mind would volunteer to be turned into a monstrosity?" he continued in an emotion choked voice. "I thought I could do better... if I grew them from a cellular level... I was so wrong... so very wrong."
"THere was actually a fourth, he continued. SHe was so deformed she didn't make it. I named her Blasphemy. After what I had done, it seemed somehow fitting."
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Post by mh on Jan 26, 2018 3:12:56 GMT -6
"he's nuts, let's go." says babu.
as they're leaving they see a girl sitting by a fountain.
"hi! im blasphemy!" she exclaims.
using his new catchphrase that signifies he's seen an attractive female, mh cries, "my weinny hurts!"
"you're blasphemy?" exclaims babu. "i thought you didn't make it -- and were horribly disfigured."
"yeah," says blasphemy, "i was pretty jacked up -- but you got that doc's insane, right? I let him think i croaked! and unlike the other powder puff girls, i can morph! i morphed into a 21 yr old bidness major who worked part time at the pottery barn! and it stuck. are you looking for this?"
she holds out a cloth powder puff girl head.
"inside here is a vial of chemical x!" she exclaims.
"it's yours -- but take me to justice city! i've always been a small town girl with big town dreams." |
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Post by Babu Baboon on Jan 28, 2018 19:34:03 GMT -6
Kenny and Buddy work through the night, assisted by Steve... and by Gil who went on frequent coffee runs. Early the next morning, Kenny comes out and says, "I think we done got it!"
"You came up with a chemical X detector?"
"That's what I done said!" Kenny says. "Now somebody get me a malt liquer!"
"Quick!" MH shouts to the interns. "WHen he's completely sober he sounds like a cross between Frasier Crane and Jeremy Irons. It's unbearable!"
Taffy tosses Kenny and Buddy each a malt Liquer which they quickly shotgun."
"Hey, don't forget about me!" Steve says. Don't leave a brother hangin'"
Don't worry, sweetie. I didn't forget you!" Taffy says as she tosses him a Yoo-Hoo.
"Now that's what I'm talkin' about!" Steve says.
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Post by Babu Baboon on Feb 4, 2018 19:21:34 GMT -6
Later, the Monkey Alliance is hunkered down outside the turkey farm where Von Gobbels is being held. "OK," Turkeyhead says. "From the intelligence I've gathered, this place is pretty secure. We need to get in without being detected or we could end up in Guantanamo Bay."
"I've been water boarded before," MH says. "It's no picnic, let me tell you."
"I could teleport inside," Doc says. "Or Super Jesse and could fly in at super speed, or..."
Doc is suddenly cut short when they hear an *ahem*
They turn around to see a horde of angry turkeys glaring at them.
"Oh crap! The turkeys have taken the farm!" Babu says.
They suddenly hear the click of a revolver and they turn around. "I guess we know who led the revolt," Doc says.
"Von Gobbels," Turkeyhead says grimly.
"Zo, I zee you haf found me, mine old enemy," Von Gobbels says.
Suddenly the device in Kenny's hand starts making a loud dinging. "Hey, the dookickey I made done worked. Am I good or what?"
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Post by mh on Apr 19, 2018 1:38:40 GMT -6
"get them super-jesse!" cries babu.
"ah look how cute they are with their little guns," says super-jesse. "I could't hurt 'em!"
"drat!" says babu. "i saw another farm nearby -- lets retreat there. buddy, cover us!"
buddy begins firing he & kenny's latest piece of pseudo military hardware, the giblet gravy cannon.
the turkey's scream & flee.
"turkeyhead, no real giblets were used in the making of that gravy!" exclaims babu.
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Post by mh on Apr 21, 2018 5:11:55 GMT -6
eager to earn his bones, newest member voland67, also known as 'spam lad' hurls himself into the fray.
"up, up and away! penal enlargement can be yours!" he exclaims.
"no spam lad, don't do it!" cries doc quantum.
suddenly, a 'grand slam gobbler' leaps from a thicket, and launching a heat seeking missile, blows the 'junk mail juggernaut' to bits.
"nooooooooooooo!" cries super-jesse. "him & my cousin was good pals."
and watching from metropolis with his super-vision, is a familiar figure.
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Post by Babu Baboon on Nov 30, 2018 20:13:50 GMT -6
Suddenly, a colorful blur zips by, colliding with the grand slam gobbler and sending up a cloud of feathers. As the feathers dissipate, the Powerpuff Girls appear hovering before before them.
"We heard from Proffesor Plutonium that you could use out help," Blossom said.
Thanks!" Babu says. "You... uh... you.."
"Is something wrong?" Buttercup says.
"I'm sorry, " Babu says. "You guys are just really hard to look at."
"That's okay," Bubbles giggles. "We get that a lot."
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