|
|
Post by Babu Baboon on Oct 31, 2013 15:42:11 GMT -6
"OK, you heard her," Babu said. "Mind your manners and maybe Taffy won't turn you into a Toad. Now take us to those 40s."
The witch leads the way to the kitchen and then opens the pantry doors. With a wave of her hands, the crate of 'Honey Bunches of Radishes' levitates to reveal the elusive 40s.
"Hot damn!" 'Taffy' exclaims. A withered hand moves up to rip off what turns out to be a latex mask revealing Tom Savini. "It's chugging time!"
"A hell," Babu says, looking over at the angry witch whose eyes are starting to glow.
|
|
|
|
Post by mh on Nov 2, 2013 9:16:08 GMT -6
"run!!" cries babu, and they all turn & haul arse down the hall. the witch screeches and starts to make chase, but is unaccustomed to the wedding style high heels she'd inexplicably found in ronny mcface's old room, and she takes a tumble.
"i'll get you my pretties, "she exclaims, "I mean uglies!"
"this way, through the old servant's quarters, "says singe, "all your hobo craftyness has gotten us nowhere!! the witch is too clever -- but I have one last idea that might work."
after many twists & turns thru cob-webbed passages, they come into a stone entrance that opens into a large chamber. drawings of goats and bulls are on the floor, but the center is taken up by a large pentagram.
"you see," begins jeremiah singe, "the singe family dabbled in a bit of satanism." singe covers his mouth with his hand, and smiles at them in mock embarrassment, like he's been naughty. "if we could call forth some entity from the dark recesses of the netherworld, maybe that booze hating hag would hop on her broomstick and go find other deceased landowners & hobos to bother."
|
|
|
|
Post by Babu Baboon on Nov 3, 2013 9:04:57 GMT -6
Singe gave everyone a slip of paper with the words they were supposed to recite. Everyone joined hands and began chanting.
Suddenly, a dark cloud of swirling smoke began forming in the center. The cloud of smoke began to grow until it was over six feet tall. The cloud suddenly parted to reveal a man shaped form.
"Holy Sh--, it's Desk-boy!" Babu exclaimed.
|
|
|
|
Post by mh on Nov 3, 2013 21:37:04 GMT -6
"who has disturbed me .. !! ... oh jeez, not you guys."
"omg, "cries babu, "jesse was right! you really were a deamon! wow, this really explains so much."
desk-boy looking sheepish, "i never wanted you guys to find out ... certainly not this way. ... wait, is that tom savini?"
savini, sober now, smiles and waves.
"it's an honor sir!!" desk-boy proclaims. I've met lots of demons that don't look half as real as the ones that you make."
|
|
|
|
Post by Babu Baboon on Nov 5, 2013 6:55:16 GMT -6
Babu and the rest quickly tell Desk-boy about the witch, her minions, and everything that has happened. "The minions shouldn't be any problem," Desk-boy says. "They're minor demons. I'm an arch-demon."
"You're really a real live demon?" Tom Savini asks.
"Yes, I'm lord of the malaise that comes from working in a cubicle every day," Desk-boy says.
"Wow," Savini says.
""Anyhoo," why don't you guys take me to this witch and her demons so we can deal with this," Desk-boy says.
|
|
|
|
Post by mh on Nov 6, 2013 1:11:59 GMT -6
they meet the witch in the main hallway, who is by this time running & carrying her shoes. the minions notice deskboy & freeze.
"do I really have to say anything?" he asks. and they flee back into the netherworld.
"guys, "desk-boy says, "let me negotiate with the witch. it's what I do."
|
|
|
|
Post by Babu Baboon on Nov 6, 2013 7:32:28 GMT -6
After some Desk-boy returns to the group. "The witch has agreed to going back to looking like the buxom maid on a permanent basis in return for Singe going through with the marriage."
"It will be hard not to picture her gruesome witch form every time we're boinking, but I suppose I can soldier through," Singe sighs.
"Great!" Desk-boy says, clapping his hands together. "So lets have ourselves a wedding!"
|
|
|
|
Post by mh on Nov 7, 2013 0:38:11 GMT -6
"well," says babu, "I guess jerimiah singe decided to 'say yes, to the witch'."
"wow, "mh says, "that old witch doesn't look bad in her 'buxom chambermaid' disguise ....
... singe is a lucky guy."
"ah, I liked her better before, "says deskboy, "she had more character."
"and remember singe, "deskboy calls to singe where Kenny and buddy are helping him tie his tie, "every fourth night, 5 minutes of cuddling."
"drat!!!" cries singe.
buddy cries throughout the ceremony, with kenny and tom savini consoling him. and afterward, they're toasting with goblets of 'nurse mcCready's surgical bruise lotion', and eating microwave pigs in a blanket.
"that was beautiful, "buddy says to deskboy. "that dead reverend you summoned from hell did a wonderful job. and I can't even beleive I caught the bouquet."
"now off to our honeymoon, "says the witch coyly.
"not so fast, "says jeremiah singe. "sorry my dear, but first I must travel back to the spirit world for a post wedding celebration. come kenneth & buderick! my 19th century friends have laid in 5 boxes of poppers and all the old english we can drink! we're having it large!!"
kenny & buddy hurry over, and they all disappear in a puff of smoke. the witch throws a vase at singe, but too late.
"y'know, "says babu, "I can't help but liking that guy."
"farewell hobos!" says singe. his voice, echoing," enjoy being indoors! but back to the train yard with you before I return -- and no more trying on my smoking jackets!"
"ummm, "maybe not so much, "says babu.
"oh well," the witch says, reverting to her original form," marriage is all about give & take I guess. i'm gonna go scare the hell out of all our neighbors. toodles!"
"hoochy mama!" exclaims desk-boy.
"do you think Kenny & buddy will be okay babu?" mh asks.
"ummm, whatever, " babu replies.
"wait, "exclaims tom savini, "what about the precious 40's?"
|
|
|
|
Post by Babu Baboon on Nov 8, 2013 14:05:39 GMT -6
The crew make their way back to the pantry and MH grabs for one of the 40s. "Finally!" he exclaims, unscrewing the top.
MH takes a swig and makes a disgusted face. "Gah!" he gags. "They've gone skunky!!"
"No way!" Babu says. "You man after all this, the 40s aren't fit to drink?"
"No problem," Tom Savini says. "I can still have them analyzed to get the secret formula. I'll send you guys a case after I have it." MH and Babu help him load the 50 40s into his car and he heads on his way.
"Well s--t," Babu says. "I was really looking forward to that."
"Well, we've still got the rest of what Kenny and Buddy brought," MH says. "The rest of the champagne, too."
""Well, you two dorks can sit and drink by yourselves," Desk-boy says. "I'm going where Kenny, Buddy, and Singe went for a real party."
"Hold up, we're coming with you!" Babu says.
|
|
|
|
Post by woo woo morgan on Jun 10, 2021 3:40:47 GMT -6
woop woop!
|
|
