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Post by Babu Baboon on Nov 16, 2013 13:24:39 GMT -6
I originally posted this on our long lost Inside The Web board years ago, but as a cautionairy tale, I figured it bore repeating. 
Based on a bet by the other members of his threesome, Everett Sanchez tried to wash his own
"balls" in a ball washer at the local golf course. Proving once again that beer and testosterone are a bad mix, Sanchez managed to straddle the ball washer and dangle his scrotum in the machine.
Much to his dismay, one of his buddies upped the ante by spinning the crank on the machine with Sanchez's scrotum in place, thus wedging them solidly in the mechanism.
Sanchez, who immediately passed his threshold of pain, collapsed and tumbled from his perch. Unfortunately for Sanchez, the height of the ball washer was more than a foot higher off the ground than his testicles are in a normal stance, and the scrotum was the weakest link. Sanchez's scrotum was ripped open during the fall, and one testicle was plucked from him forever and remained in the ball washer, while the other testicle was compressed and flattened as it was pulled between the housing of the washer, and the rotating machinery inside.
To add insult to injury, Sanchez broke a new $300 driver that he had just purchased from the pro shop, and was using to balance himself. Sanchez was rushed to the hospital for surgery, and the remaining two members of the threesome were asked to leave the course. |
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Post by mh on Nov 16, 2013 14:01:14 GMT -6
OUCH!!! thanks babu, i'll walk funny for the rest of the day now.
i hope they hosed out the golf ball washer
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Post by Doc Quantum on Nov 18, 2013 17:16:14 GMT -6
Damn! That guy might someday be a contender for the Darwin Awards! How stupid can you get? You always protect your balls, people! ALWAYS! |
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Post by Babu Baboon on Nov 18, 2013 18:19:59 GMT -6
He actually got an honorary Darwin award for having his ability to procreate ripped out!
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Post by lothar on Dec 19, 2013 21:13:10 GMT -6
How stupid can you get? You always protect your balls, people! ALWAYS! You would think there would e some warning screaming in this guys head DO NOT DO THIS! |
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Post by Babu Baboon on Dec 19, 2013 21:17:17 GMT -6
How stupid can you get? You always protect your balls, people! ALWAYS! You would think there would e some warning screaming in this guys head DO NOT DO THIS! This is the kind of thing that gets products stuck with blatantly obvious warning labels. |
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Post by mh on Dec 19, 2013 22:01:26 GMT -6
yeah, "it is reccomended not to insert gonads ..." that guy must have had several dozen vodka shots in the pro-shop bar. makes me wonder if maybe females really are superior. would a woman ever stick her hooter in one of those things? ever? i'm guessing no
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Post by Babu Baboon on Dec 19, 2013 22:08:16 GMT -6
No, but a drunk girl might encourage her drunk boyfriend to stick his balls in the ballwasher.
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Post by mh on Dec 19, 2013 22:16:21 GMT -6
No, but a drunk girl might encourage her drunk boyfriend to stick his balls in the ballwasher. |
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mxy
New Member
Posts: 9 
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Post by mxy on Dec 20, 2013 11:55:53 GMT -6
Did the ball that fell off at least end up in the golf course and score a hole in one? That would make everything worth it for poor Sanchez.
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Post by Babu Baboon on Dec 20, 2013 14:12:00 GMT -6
That's a shot you can only make twice in a lifetime.
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Post by Thai Ladyboy on Dec 21, 2013 3:10:08 GMT -6
I feel for people who have suffered through devastating crotch-related injuries, having gone through one in the past.
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Post by Babu Baboon on Dec 21, 2013 11:04:49 GMT -6
I feel for people who have suffered through devastating crotch-related injuries, having gone through one in the past.  |
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Post by mh on Dec 21, 2013 14:22:59 GMT -6
That's a shot you can only make twice in a lifetime. really baboon? really? there was a couple of seconds there when you coulda' chose not to click the send button on that  |
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Post by mh on Dec 21, 2013 14:26:57 GMT -6
I feel for people who have suffered through devastating crotch-related injuries, having gone through one in the past. i'm very sorry. was 'hyena football' involved ? |
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