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Post by mh on Nov 18, 2020 2:16:19 GMT -6
"omg! they're being annihilated! kenny?! can't something be done?" asks dakota from the hotel balcony. then she swoons grabs the railing and projectile pukes straight down, covering several retreating feather-covered wannabe thunderdome guys in yuck. they cry out, slip in it, and fall painfully to the pavement.
"thought you'd get away, huh?" says babu giggling. then he walks over and sadistically drenches the prone figures in foamy stinky monkey-pee.
"DAKOTA!!!" he yells looking up to the balcony in admiration. "good hurl! nice form, nice technique, nice follow-thru. people! is this an intern or what?!!" he demands.
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Post by mh on Dec 10, 2020 4:56:44 GMT -6
clinging to the railing, dakota blacks out momentarily and wakes up, looks down and yells, "what happened to my clothes?!"
"me & buddy made you a costume using bed sheets & ink from complementary sharpies. you're now done 'vomit lass'!" says kenny.
"nooooo!!!" cries dakota.
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Post by mh on Dec 10, 2020 5:20:22 GMT -6
below, a jeep full of faux thunderdome-ers sideswipes mh & is escaping.
"help us, 'vomit lass'!" cries doc quantum.
"listen!" begins dakota, but then overcome with sickness again, she projectile pukes down into the escaping vehicle, and it crashes into a tree.
"ahhhh! i'm going back to the seminary!" screams a girl jumping out of the jeep & running away. the others sprawl out in a puke covered heap, weeping.
"hurray for "vomit lass!" cries mh.
"it's not my fault," whines vomit-lass pitifully. "i respond badly to thai food."
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Post by Babu Baboon on Jan 8, 2021 22:56:11 GMT -6
After pounding their way through the crowd, the roid-raging Monkey Alliance spots the tricked out dune buggy with Lord Humongous. "Now we've got him!" Babu Baboon cries insanely.
Lord Humongous recoils in fear at the massively inhance simian figure charging towards him. Suddenly, though, the figure begins to grow smaller.
"No... no...no... no!" Babu exclaims, feeling the effects of the emergency pack wearing off.
"Ha!" Lord Humongous says. "Whatever trick you used has worn off! You are mine!"
The now emaciated Babu grapples with Lord Humongous, severely weakened. What little power he has remaining is barely enough to hold off the Road Warrior mutant wannabee.
"Babu!" "You done need to take this!" Kenny cries out, racing towards them. He throws an object towards them.
Babu takes one hand off of Lord Humongous' shoulder to catch it and is stunned to see that it is the perfect weapon.
Babu rears back and smashes the can across the head of Lord Humongous. The enormous leader of the 'mutants' falls to the ground unconscious.
"We did it!" MH exclaims. "We beat them!"
"Great!" Dakota says from the balcony sickly. "Can we go home now?"
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Post by Babu Baboon on Jan 8, 2021 23:07:00 GMT -6
Over the next few weeks, the team trains vigorously to get back into fighting shape. Despite their many entreaties, Dakota refuses to join the team as Vomit-Lass and stays an intern.
One afternoon, MH and Doc catch Babu sitting quietly in the Monkey Alliance Headquarters' lounge.
"He, pal," MH says. "You've been kinda quiet since we got back. Is everything okay?"
"Yeah," Babu says. "I've just been doing a lot of soul searching."
"That's understandable," Doc says. "You've been through a lot. We all have."
"I've decided that rather than try to find fulfillment by recapturing my youth, I should be doing it by helping others."
"Dude, we're already super heroes. What more can you do?" MH says.
"I've decided to give to those less fortunate," Babu says, sitting up straighter in his chair. "In fact, I just shipped off a huge assortent of clothes to an impoverished third world village just this morning!"
"Well, good for you," Doc Quantum says.
"Yeah," Babu says. "Let me tell you, it's a good feeling knowing I've impacted someone's life out there. A real good feeling indeed."
The End
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Post by dark storm (mh) on May 12, 2021 20:11:11 GMT -6
baboon you turd, this isn't finished!
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Post by Babu_Baboon on May 12, 2021 21:45:38 GMT -6
Sorry, MH. I know you said in our private message brainstorming sessions that you wanted a love scene with Big Gay Al, but I couldn't find a way to work it in.
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Post by mh on May 22, 2021 12:33:33 GMT -6
okay that's it, no more mr nice guy
the m.a. hardbodies getaway -- aka, hardbodies one mo' time!
epilogue:
after dropping off mh & doc quantum, babu recieves a text from his ex.
babu:"hmmm. she says she has a box full of my old windbreakers! sweet! i'll pick those right up."
unbeknownst to babu, the former mrs. baboon, angry about his 'hardbodies getaway' had hatched a cunning plan.
Days before she had contacted kenny & buddy."
former mrs baboon: "oh thank you for coming over so quickly! my Kenmore refrigerator you repaired ...."
"you're running low on häagen-dazs!" screeches the fridge, like a more annoying alexia.
"haha," says the former mrs. baboon,"the poor thing, has become despondent! she needs a boyfriend! Can you help me? here's a sketch i've drawn ...."
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Post by mh on May 22, 2021 12:53:55 GMT -6
the next day, "just done speak into his control," says buddy handing her an old toshiba vhs remote. "you might says, done give the Kenmore a gentle hug, and done whisper sweet nothings in her ear."
buddy tears up.
"oh thank you so much you two insane neanderthals, er ... i mean two nature's noblemen." she says. "oh, btw, here!"
she goes inside the fridge and pulls this out and hands it to kenny.
"you're completely out of malt liquor!" says the fridge.
"ha ha ha haa" laughs kenny & buddy.
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Post by mh on May 22, 2021 13:05:57 GMT -6
days later:
how is the fridge done running? i hope we didn't done mess up yer warranty." says buddy.
"good!" replies the former mrs. baboon, "i had a Kenmore person check it. he hooked a scanner to it. he seemed a little upset. he said normally the scanner read-out should say how many months it's good before it needs another checkup. but it read 867 years! then he asked how it could be running since the electrical cord wasn't even plugged in! then he ran out. strange man."
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Post by mh on May 22, 2021 13:25:35 GMT -6
days after these faithful events, babu pulls into his exes drive-way. seeing the house's door open he wanders in & it slams behind him.
"wow, windy!" oh, hiya. where's my damn box fulla windbreakers?"
"there are no windbreakers!" yells the former mrs baboon. "how did your 'hardbodies getaway' go?"
"ummm, okay," says babu looking around suspiciously, starting to smell a rat. "but i didn't do ... uhh ...any screwing around."
"well don't worry, "says the former mrs. baboon, "you're about to have all the sex you can handle!"
"huh, okay," says babu, noticing she was looking pretty hot, and relaxing a little. but wait, he thought, why is she dressed like a super villainess?
**click for fuckbot!** |
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Post by mh on May 22, 2021 13:41:19 GMT -6
a quick thinking baboon managed to escape, but not with his butt virginity intact. then later, the former mrs baboon, in her villainess identity as "robot butt rape lass", send's the horny f-ck-bot to the home of the former M.A. member ronnie mcface, who is collaborating with artist rob liefeld on his latest comic, because in 1997 he rudely insulted her coy pond.
the 'f-ck-bot 5000' smashes thru the door & yells, "oh dang, it must be my birthday! cause i found some white boys!"
later the m.a. was able to destroy the now rampaging & out of control robot with a two-on-one assault by the 'Klinger-bot 5000' and the 'Pimp-bot 5000'! however they were both roundly butt-sexed during the battle.
THE END |
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Post by Babu Baboon on Jun 4, 2021 17:45:46 GMT -6
Shocking post-credits scene
When the monkey Alliance returns from battle, they are stunned to find MH, in a tattered Babu Baboon costume he bought from the Party City in the Mall of Jutice. "You okay, MH?" Babu asks. You didn't answer the monkey signal. ...why are you sitting in my igloo cooler?"
"I ... I tried to nab yer wind-breakers," MH gasps.
"My vintage 50s Madmen style windbreakers?" Babu exclaims.
"I was always insanely jealous of those windbreakers," MH says. "So when I heard they were just sitting there for the taking, I had to have them. It ... it was a trap."
"well, of course it was!" Babu says. "My whole damn marriage was a trap! I could have had a box of diamonds and faberge eggs I'd left and I wouldn't have gone back for them."
"What am I gonna do?" MH groans.
"Don't worry, buddy," Babu says. "Doctor Bumm is looking for ways to get time shaved off his sentence, so we'll put him to work for you. I'm sure it will take many surgeries and a lot of physical therapy, but we'll be there for you.
"Thanks, pal," MH chokes. " I appreciate it.
FINIS
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Post by mh on Sept 12, 2021 0:11:46 GMT -6
more post credit scenes
"here," gasps mh, brandishing a pillow-case, collapsing to the ground. "surgery ain't necessary, my clone healing factor has 99% healed my dookie-shute! but here ..."
opening the pillow-case, "my windbreakers!" cries babu. "they're indescribably beautiful! they're all here!"
somehow a brave mh, after getting his salad tossed by a psychotic robot had managed to find babu's windbreakers, shove them into a pillowcase & make his escape.
"and this pillow-case is from her favorite set! ha! her mom embroiderer them!" exclaims babu. "mh, you pecan pie eating freak, i love you so much! i'm giving you a windbreaker!"
mh: "can i have the blue one?"
babu: "no."
THE END
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