|
|
Post by Babu Baboon on Feb 6, 2014 18:35:51 GMT -6
"Obviously, it's not," Vegaton says. "I suggest you contact your crimson counterpart. I'll contact my own doppelganger, as well."
Once the Blue Pompadour leaves, Vegaton turns his chair towards a large monitor, hits a button, and Gary Degaton's image comes on screen. "What is it?" Degaton says.
"We have a problem," Vegaton says. "Rifts are opening and we're not the ones opening them."
|
|
|
|
Post by Babu Baboon on Feb 21, 2014 19:02:15 GMT -6
Mayor Bruce Campbell is sitting in his office enjoying a scotch as his secretary goes over his itinerary. His attention is more foccussed on her cleavage than what she's saying.
".... and then you have a meeting with your deputy mayor," she says.
"Mmm-hmm," he nods.
"And then the police commissioner wants to speak with you around noon...."
"Mmm-hmmm...."
"And then at 4, you have your meeting with the Justice Dept. of Water and Power."
There's a sudden flash and Mayor Bruce Campbell changes into Mayor Alan Sues. "I don't trutht them! They're not peanut butter eaterth!"
|
|
|
|
Post by mh on Feb 21, 2014 20:32:26 GMT -6
(oh, crap! omg baboon, what're you trying to do, kill me?!!)
"lithen girls! thith is an emergencthy! we need to call in the nathanal guard!" continues mayor sues. "and i need a peter pan peanut butter thandwich! i skipped lunch, i need to concentrateth! and keep the deputy mayor, the police commissioner & the water/power people away from me!"
"and there are some strange kids here, err mayor campbell," says the secretary. looking at him strangely.
"well let 'em in!" he exclaims, "kidths are peaenut putther eaterths!!"
  
meanwhile mayor bruce campbell is in the parallel earth office.
"mayor, you look strange & are acting kind of butch!" says one of the male interns.
"what is going on?" asks mayor bruce campbell. not completely aware of what has happened, because the office looks exactly the same.
"bring me a scotch," he says.
"but sir, you drink wine spritzers," says another male intern.
"what?!" exclaims campbell.
|
|
|
|
Post by Babu Baboon on Mar 12, 2014 13:15:42 GMT -6
"Wine spritzers?!!!" Mayor Bruce Campbell exclaims.
He jumps up from his desk, races from his office, past all the effeminate male secretaries, down the front steps and raises his fist to the night sky, screaming into the night sky," Why, God, why? Am I part of some great cosmic joke? My booze! My hot secretaries! Why, God? Why?!!!"
|
|
|
|
Post by mh on Mar 13, 2014 23:50:15 GMT -6
at the same time mayor alan sues yells, "scotch?! Yuck!!"
sues jumps up from his desk, races from his office, past all the hot female secretaries, down the front steps and raises his fist to the night sky, screaming into the night sky," Why, Krishna, or whatever female/male deity, why?!! am I part of some great cosmic shenanigans? my delicious wine spritzers! my hot man-secretaries! why, g-d? why?!!!"
|
|
|
|
Post by Babu Baboon on Mar 24, 2014 19:53:22 GMT -6
Later, after Mayor Bruce Campbell has pulled himself together, he calls the National Guard to confer on the situation. He is surprised when the General who shows up looks like a cross between a doorman and a cartoon general.
After a brief update, he says, "So this is happening all over the world?"
"Yes, but the Simian Consortium has told us they're on the cases.
"The who?"," Mayor Bruce Campbell says.
Suddenly, Babu Baboon walks in with Doc, MH, Hairbutt, Manny, Floyd the Mighty Boyd, and Rock throwing Lass.
"THe Monkey Alliance! Thank God!" the Mayor exclaims.
"The who?" says the general.
|
|
|
|
Post by mh on Mar 27, 2014 21:34:10 GMT -6
mayor sues goes into mayor campbell's office and happily sees a bunch of kids, until he notices the sandwiches are untouched.
"mayor, you are from the other dimension, "says one, who seems to be their leader. "nothing can stop the dimension crash now -- and no one had better try, or the doodies are going to hit the fan."
"wait, "exclaims sues in horror, "you kidths -- you aren't peanut butter eathers!"
|
|
|
|
Post by Babu Baboon on Apr 8, 2014 19:26:18 GMT -6
Mayor Sues screeches in horror, racing from his office as he's pelted with peanut butter sandwiches. "But kidth love peanut butter!!! What crathy horrible world have I sthumbled into?"
As he runs out the front of city hall, he collides into Horatio Hippopotimus, Drivtaan, the interns, and the Simian Consortium's without pay trainees.
"Mayor Sues?" Sandy says. "Are you okay?"
|
|
|
|
Post by mh on Apr 15, 2014 19:58:18 GMT -6
"there's thome thscary non-peanut butter eating kidths in my office ... except it ain't my office!" shrieks mayor sues.
going in they find the office empty, but they can see the kids outside. they apparently left from the window, and appeared to be floating down the street.
"they staid they're responthcible for what's going on!"
"ouuu." says the lead intern. "they may be partially. there was uuum some experiments done to try & make the kids from our planet ... less like almost everyone else on our planet. y'know, with a greater ability to absorb knowledge. those kids are the result."
"they made kidths hate peanut butther? monsthers!" screeches mayor sues.
"i'm not goin' back to that playth! where ever thith is, i'm sthayin' here!" |
|
|
|
Post by Babu Baboon on Apr 16, 2014 21:08:48 GMT -6
"I think I've found the cause of the additional rifts," Gary Degaton tells Larry Vegaton.
"You have?" Vegaton says from his secret lair on Earth-Q.
"Yes," Degaton says. "Have a look at this satellite footage." A window pops up on Vegaton's screen with the image of the kids from Sue's office floating down the street.
"Damn," Vegaton says. "How did they get loose?"
|
|
|
|
Post by mh on Apr 16, 2014 21:53:56 GMT -6
suddenly a little gurl walks up to mayor alan sues, who was one of the strange kids, and she's eating a sandwich. her eyes are no longer glowing.
"you're weird mayor," she says, "but you make a great peanut butter sandwich."
 
"thee!" says mayor sues, picking her up. "you can thrust kidths! we gotta get thum peanut buthetter into those others before iths too late!" |
|
|
|
Post by Babu Baboon on Apr 17, 2014 18:31:47 GMT -6
Vegaton signs off with Degaton and steps away from the console. There was at least one consolation. If the Bad Seed was no longer on Earth-Q, then they were no longer his problem. Pity Degaton and the Scarlet Mullet.
The doors to his office slide open and he lets out a gasp. There before him, in the hallway, are a group of blond children with glowing eyes. "No!! No!! Nooooooo!!!"
Have we got any clue what is causing these rifts?" Mayor Bruce Campbell asks.
"We have an equation that seems to have something to do with the rifts," Babu says. When we said the equation, Hairbutt fell through."
"So it can cause the rifts?" Campbell says.
"It would seem so," Doc says.
"Let's go to the big room," the General says. "The world's finest scientific minds have assembled there to help us deal with this."
"I'd take 'finest scientific minds' with a grain of salt," MH whispers to the mayor.
They walk down the hall to the 'big room'. When they throw open the doors, Dr. Brain and the other scientists are huddled in the corner. In the center of the room are several blond children with glowing eyes.
|
|
|
|
Post by mh on May 3, 2014 2:30:36 GMT -6
meanwhile at the mayor's office, the simian consortium without-pay trainees, sandy, candy, brandy, and mabel and working hurriedly on one of the secretary's decades old PCs.
"this thing is incredible," says sandy, "far more advanced than anything in current use on our planet."
"unbelievable." says drivaan, just returning from the bathroom.
"we've managed to come up with a counter solution," says sandy, "if two super-beings race across the planet at top speed, it's possible both our earths will normalize."
"okay, "i'm in!" says drivaan, taking off his jacket. "luckily I wore my nikes today."
mabel snickers.
"what!?" cries drivaan.
"oh your fast," says brandy, "but not fast enough for our purposes -- we pulled up your file -- we pulled up everyone's file."
"but I can break the sound barrier!" says drivaan.
mabel snickers again.
|
|
|
|
Post by mh on May 3, 2014 2:46:54 GMT -6
"no, we only found two possible candidates, "says candy.
suddenly super-jesse flies in and yells, "ta da!" followed by an unknown older guy in a blue uniform.
"who're you?" asks drivaan.
"i am the blur, "he replies, without enthusiasm. "the world's fastest lad."
"why have i never heard of you?!" asks drivaan.
"oh, i'm from the monkey-alliance's dark and hidden past," he replies. "in the 70's we were a group of superteens called, 'the super banana bunch'! led by monkey-mask jone's son 'skip' who was 'the big banana'! we were sponsored by bic pens and had our own saturday morning show."
|
|
|
|
Post by mh on May 3, 2014 3:02:19 GMT -6
"instead of doing real heroics like you'd expect," he continues, "our cases were like, 'the kid who cut class'! 'the kid who tried a cigarette'! 'the fat kid who got trapped in a mine in a ghost town'! sh-t like that. finally i got fed up & left."
"but you can't be faster than me!" exclaims drivaan.
mabel giggles.
"cut it out mabel!" cries drivaan.
"how about a contest?" asks the blur.
"okay," says sandy, "we're starving! each of you take off & get us some chinese food. but remember, we're vegan. and no MSG. go!"
both speedsters take off, and in less than 30 seconds they each return with bags of steaming chow mein. drivaan a split second behind the blur.
"you've beaten me," sighs driv. "but it was close! i got mine from 'hong's' down the street. where'd you go?"
"shanghai," replies the blur. |
|
