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Post by mh on May 8, 2022 23:16:08 GMT -6
minutes later, the monkey alliance members and the agents are installed into a luxurious penthouse.
"hey this is a lux-u-rus joint!" says mh. "this is some kind of joint."
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Post by mh on May 8, 2022 23:18:46 GMT -6
"how are you doug?" asks the second agent.
"i am the great cornholio!" says doug.
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Post by Babu Baboon on May 21, 2022 14:01:00 GMT -6
Meanwhile, in the casino, two grey aliens are looking miserable.
"Why are you still at the blackjack table, Gorak!" says the second alien, sitting down.
"I'm afraid to leave!" the first alien says. "If the Big Giant Head finds out what I've done, he'll have me vaporized!"
"Wht do you mean 'what you've done?'" the second alien says suspiciously.
"I've lost it all!" the first alien says. "I bet everything I had. These Erth gaames are just too dmn addictive!"
"Well, that's it," the second lien says through gritted teeth. "Mission over. I guess we're leaving."
"We can't," the first alien says. "I bet the ship, too. It belongs to Worms-In-Brain, now."
"You mean we're stranded here?" the second alien exclaims.
"Pretty much," the first alien says.
"How could this happen?" the second alien says, leaning on the table and burying his head in his arms."
"I know," the first alien says miserably. "Who give a gaming and casino license to a skinwalker?"
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Post by mh on May 22, 2022 21:34:39 GMT -6
a few minutes later the two aliens, joined by a third, bursts into the m.a. penthouse and slam the door behind them.
"we're taking the big bedroom!" exclaims gorak.
"gorak!" says the agent in suprise.
gorak looks at babu and says:
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Post by mh on May 22, 2022 21:53:24 GMT -6
the three begin going thru cabinets and find 3 little bathrobes, then grabbing a bottle of champagne from a case, they begin chugging it & passing it around. then they collapse on the couch.
"gorak! what happened?!" asks the agent.
the small grey alien explains & doug says, "this is awful."
"it's their problem," says doc quantum, "the three rude stranded little space traveling gambling addicted weirdos."
"no," says the other agent, "if their people think we earthlings took it, it could cause an interplanetary war!"
"shut up! we're pllayin jeopardy on the theevee! fiddy dollars a game!" says one of the aliens.
"you're blowing our expense account!" says doug.
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Post by mh on May 22, 2022 22:02:24 GMT -6
"name a popular holiday." says the robotic voice of alex trebek.
"what is the moons of meebsorp!" exclaims gorak triumphantly as the other two nod vigorously in agreement.
"bzzzztt!!!" goes the buzzer.
"what the blartch?!!" cries gorak.
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Post by mh on May 22, 2022 22:10:59 GMT -6
"we gotta get their ship back," whispers the agent. "they are terrible gamblers. if they try to win it back they'll lose everything but their little underpants."
"but aren't they geniuses? like we're bugs compared the them?" asks babu.
"they don't send their best & brightest to earth i'm afraid, "says the agent. "they are suppose to just monitor the planet."
"what about the cattle mutilations?" asks mh.
"no idea."
"what about the probings?" asks doc.
"my theory is they're just pervs." says doug.
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Post by mh on May 22, 2022 22:27:37 GMT -6
"name a popular male film star." says the robotic trebek voice.
"who is glack blargsfarr!!" yells gorak. the other two nod fervently in agreement.
"bzzzztt!!" sounds the buzzer.
"gleeps!" cries gorak.
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Post by mh on May 22, 2022 23:20:05 GMT -6
babu notices kenny lying on a divan.
"i've got it!" says babu. "when drunk, kenny is unbeatable at any game of chance."
"huh?" says kenny sitting up. "i drunk about a case of that shapagyne stuff an i ain't even buzzed."
"then all is lost!" cries doug.
babu grabs a phone & says, "send up a bellman."
hanging up he says, "the bellmen know the seedy underbelly of the hotel. he'll help us."
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Post by mh on May 22, 2022 23:24:25 GMT -6
later the bellman arrives & babu says, "we need beer."
"what kind sir?" asks the bellman.
"not normal beer, "says babu. "we need ... power."
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Post by mh on May 22, 2022 23:33:07 GMT -6
minutes later the bellman arrives with an iced tub of "snake venom". kenny jerks the tops off three with his bare hand & sucks them down.
"that's impossible!" cries the bellman. the agent tosses a wad of cash at him & he runs out.
"okay kenny, let's get sharpened up." says babu.
they go down into the lobby & buy matching suits & get matching haircuts.
babu: kenny?
kenny: yeah?
babu: let's play some cards.
kenny: yeah.
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Post by Babu Baboon on May 23, 2022 4:53:12 GMT -6
Babu rubs his hands together enthusiastically with a devious chuckle. "Okay, which one is the 'Go-Fish' table? I kill at that game.
Kenny, still reeling over how a six foot baboon looks a lot like Vince McMahon when you shave it down, does yet another double take at Babu's statement.
"Uh, I done think you better let me take the lead this time, boss," he says.
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Post by Babu Baboon on May 24, 2022 5:11:09 GMT -6
Meanwhile, bck in the penthouse....
"Where you been?" Doc asks MH, who walks in the door holding his gut.
"Hitting that all you can eat buffet," MH says with a groan. "You know they've got a chocolate fountain, a shrimp tower and 24 hour brick oven pizza? I think I might have overdid it."
"Jeeze, you look like you're in your third trimester!" Doug says.
"That's hurtful, Doug!" MH excaims, heading for the bathroom.
"Three govars says he demolishes that toilet," Gorvak says.
"You're on," the second alien says, fist bumping him.
"Nuh uh," the third alien says, folding his arms. "That's a sucker bet!"
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Post by mh on May 25, 2022 16:33:15 GMT -6
meanwhile back in the casino, security cameras have noticed kenny is dragging a bellman's cart full of 'snake venum' beer behind him.
"that's pretty irregular," says one security guy.
"oh, let 'em go says the head of security. "check out the '90's clothes. they're probably wealthy industrialists from düsseldorf! the more they drink. anyway the faster they'll lose their dough. look at the one guy. he had half a beer and he's wandered into the kiddie arcade and is playing 'spongebob jellyfishing' ..."
"hee hee hee hee," says babu, "90 more tickets & i git me a bat-man squirt gun."
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Post by mh on May 26, 2022 22:31:03 GMT -6
this segment of 'lothar and the mystery of the skinwalkers' was brought to you by "gene gene the dancing machine"! watch out for nipples.
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